Trump Seal Team Super StrikeForce, Ninja-Robot Warriors.

Rudy laying down the first wave of crazy, Sidney Powell ready to bring on the second.

Here we are, nearly 3 weeks from election day, two weeks since the outcome was obvious (hint, it was Biden, with what is looking in the end to be a margin of 7 million votes). So, Joe Biden is President-Elect, Kamala Harris is Vice President-Elect and the country can move on, start dealing with the many crisis’ created by the previous administration.

Right? Please?

Sigh.

No.

You see, we have this malignant tumor bunkered down in the White House, refusing to utter the words ‘Biden Won’. Can’t do it, just can’t. He instead, after some media calls election night, came out at 3am and gave a rambling ‘victory’ speech (at a victory party that turned into another White House, covid super-spreader event) claiming victory, spewing nonsense about ‘voter fraud (really ‘election fraud’, but there ya go) and seeming to go from rage, to despair, back to rage again.

Really, I think he was going for an Emmy.

Immediately he started filing a lot of baseless lawsuits, getting laughed out of court by Republican judges, and shedding lawyers like a sheepdog sheds hair in summer. Right now, his team is led by Rudy Giuliani, the human self-debasement machine, whose previous actions helped to get Trump impeached, and by Sydney Powell, a lawyer under investigation for possibly tampering with court documents for her other client, Michael Flynn.

You hit the Batty Signal, you get the bats.  

Still, even though no reputable attorney will work for them, Trump Team Crazy is busy, filing lawsuits left and right, tossing them out like t-shirts to a crowd, shouting ‘voter fraud’ up and down the hallways.

So, how are all those 'voter fraud' cases going?

They're not. So far Trump 'Elite StrikeForce Team' are 1-33. That means out of the 34 cases they brought, they're won one. One. Here's another thing; they're not actually voter fraud cases.

While Trump is screaming in all caps on Twitter. and Rudy G. and Sidney Powell are making bizarre claims about 'Hugo Chavez, communists, and China' funding secret vote-flipping machines, and election fraud on a massive scale, they have yet to make these claims in court. In fact, they go out of their way NOT to claim fraud... because they have no proof of fraud. They start bringing charges of fraud then the judge is going to ask them to prove it. No, the cases have mostly been about oversight, have been about such pettiness as in Arizona, when 'sharpies' used on ballots supposedly caused them to be rejected (their own witnesses proved this to be nonsense), poll watchers not allowed in polling places in Pennsylvania. There the lawyer pissed off the judge by trying to get cute:

Judge: "Did the plaintiff have representatives in the room?"

Lawyer: "“There were a nonzero number of people in the room."

Judge: “I’m asking you as a member of the bar of this court: Are people representing the plaintiffs in the room?”

Lawyer: "Yes."

Judge: "Then what are we here for?"

Always good to en-madden the judge hearing your case.

One case filed was, literally, based on what one witness was told by another poll worker who had overheard something someone else had said. No kidding. A sort of 'double heresy', the judge laughed that out of courts with a big, fat 'come on!'.

In Georgia, Trump lawyers and minions are doing stellar work. Cybersecurity worker and expert witness in the case, Russell J. Ramsland Jr., claimed in an affidavit that his company had uncovered “evidence of inconsistencies in electronic voting machines”. Maybe he did, but not in Georgia, the districts he list were in Michigan. Red districts that voted for Trump. Oops.

He also listed a bunch of towns and counties he claimed showed there were more votes than voters. Again, maybe so, but he was listing towns in Minnesota, not Michigan. Or Georgia.

Judge tossed it. No evidence. Huh.

In Michigan, a state court judge lovingly took apart the six witnesses with claims of improprieties at the counting center, noting that had they not skipped orientation, most of their claims would have been answered. The Trump team also mis-filed a Michigan case in a court in DC. Working hard to bring the best in incompetency.

The Gang That Couldn’t Shoot Straight.

Stormtroopers on the Death Star had better aim.

The Trump team have no real cases, they have no real chance as the numbers are against them. The plan, as near as anyone can figure, seems to be to get Black votes (city of Detroit) thrown out because... the poll watchers didn't stand close enough to the counting...? Something insane. That would give them Michigan, then… something, something… Georgia and Arizona, and bam? Election won?

Really. They would have to flip three states, disenfranchise millions, and forever kill any trust in our election system.

But they’re good with that.

There is no plan, no endgame here, just throw everything at the wall and keep refiling to try and get a judge more interested in party than justice.

They're out there, McConnell saw to that.

Which brings us to the Republicans, the GOP, the party of ‘Law & Order’, friend of the ‘working man’ (that’s White working man), what are they doing about this situation?

Nothing. With a few notable exceptions, they are maintaining silence, like they always do, or crying ‘let it play out’, as Trump hacks at Democracy with an axe. Why won’t they say something? Several factors:

One; he’s still the head of the party. Hell, it IS his party, he’ll cry if he wants to, and that big, beautiful base of his is loyal not the GOP, but to Trump himself. To speak up now is to anger the base, which they will need in their next reelection, or in 2024 if their ambitions carry them that far.  

Two: mean tweets. Trump’s base may be angry, but Trump is angrier, and can focus his hatred, and that of his base, right between the eyes of anyone daring to step out of line, even a little. He loves doing it, his thumbs are fast, and he doesn’t care about spelling.

Three: they want him to succeed. Sure, it’ll tear the country apart, but hey! They stay in power another four years, country be damned. That’s what really matters, doesn’t it?

So, they’ll stall the transition of power, watch as Trump demands no one speak to the Biden/Harris team, and valuable time is lost, information is lost, chaos seeps into every crack and corner, and Trump hides behind his extra-tall, super-secure fence, and tweets all caps into the void.

January 20th cannot come soon enough.

Happy Thanksgiving.

Donny, We Need To Talk

Loser Donny, the losing-ist loser in a family of losers. You don’t have to go home, Don, but you can’t stay here.

Donny, dude, you need an intervention, so let me ‘intervent’.

Donny, all this ‘voter fraud nonsense your pushing, even you know that’s crap, right?  You just come up with a crazy claim out of thin air (or your ass), and then go looking for evidence of your made-up claim, smearing election officials and voters as you go, and encouraging your supporters to continue to harass and threaten them? That doesn't seem to be how that is supposed to work… at all. In a real investigation, you investigate, find out what going on (you know, find evidence, facts, proof) THEN you make your judgement. Right now, you're just spewing nonsense ("I won the election... by a lot!" classic tweet there, Don, but not true).

I know, I hear you, you say I’ve been told ‘Trump is a liar’ over and over (anyone ever tell you this ‘talking about yourself in the 3rd person’ thing is weird? Cause it is). Ya see Donny, I have not 'been told' Trump is a liar, I see you lie ALL THE TIME. I have eyes and ears, almost every time you open that mouth, you lie. Sometimes I think you lie just for the practice. Now you’re claiming your election watchers were not allowed in the counting rooms? Come on, I mean, come on… Your own lawyers admitted in court that the watchers were in there, watching. Didn’t they tell you? You say there were 'massive' irregularities? What evidence is there? Investigate, find evidence, THEN you can make those claims, otherwise dude, you're just spewing. Seriously, if those vile, evil DemoRATS were going to steal elections, why didn't the steal the senate as well? They didn’t think of it? Uh… right.

All this yelling about fraud in the counting is dangerous, you know that, right? You heard about the death threats against the Republican Philadelphia City Commissioner Al Schmidt has been receiving over the ballot counts? From your supporters?

No Donny, the evil 'progressives', ‘socialists’, and AOC are not making death threats in an election they won. You realize that makes zero sense, right? They aren't hiding anything. Seriously, you've bought into this so hard you don't realize you're talking and pushing baseless conspiracies.

Or do you..?

No one stole this election Donny, there is just no evidence of fraud, none, nada, zilch, just a lot of butt-hurt whinny Republicans who didn’t get their way. Even the Republicans in charge of the elections in their districts and states are saying it was a clean election, unless.... OF COURSE!!! They're only pretending to be Republicans! They've spent years undercover, knowing someday Biden would need them to smuggle in millions of ballots, disguised as Fox New camera equipment. Then, when all the aggressive GOP poll watchers' backs are turned... BAM! All those pre-marked ballots are thrown into the sorter. Election... STOLEN!!!

OMG… it’s all true!

Pre-tty nefarious. Really. See what I’m getting at here, Donny? See where it is allllll heading? Nutsy, coo-coo squirrel land. Yes, I'm making fun of the idea, but mine makes as much sense as what you, your family, and the GOP is selling. You do know Biden is up by 7 million right now. All fraudulent, I suppose? Donny, Donny, stop screaming. You want a soda? Press your Diet Coke button, buddy. Use it while you still can.

That better? Good. Where were we… Ah, yes, facts. Did you know that Republicans have struggled to win nationally for decades? Since 1992, only ONE Republican has won the popular vote. No, that wasn’t you pal, you lost by nearly three million votes. Yes, you did. Yes, you did. Donny, there is no evidence three million people voted illegally, none. No, there isn’t, No… Here I’ll press the button this time. It’s true, without the Electoral College saving them, Republicans can't win. You’re running out of angry White people. No Donny, it's not a conspiracy, it’s called ‘demographics’, and you’ve known it was coming for ya for years. And since you refuse to court POC, it's going to be harder and harder to win a national election.

Yes, even you, Don.

Come Donny, you know this nonsense is designed to undermine fair elections, undermine democracy (on the ‘Trump’ brand there), rile the armed far-right up (the ones making anonymous death threats, because classy) and give them a narrative to sell in 2022 (don't let them steal THIS one)…crazy.

You must know you can’t win, but you want to tear the whole place down out of spite. If you can’t have it, then no one can.

Like I said, on brand.

Movers will be here in January. Have your shit ready.